The world is diverse or every now and then someone else annoys me
The main ideas from the chapter are:
Variety of reactions to our internal fears – Fear of people attracts a variety of negative reactions from others (shouting, blackmail), but the essence is still the same fear.
The role of feelings – The world is based on feelings, not logic and facts. Every feeling can be expressed in different ways, which explains why different advice works differently for different people.
Social perception of the world – The world is as most people see it. Perception is therefore a collective illusion.
Making others angry – People are not angry at the author personally, they are simply angry. It’s important not to be angry with others, but to work on yourself.
Self-evaluation and appreciation – Expecting others to appreciate the author is pointless. It is necessary to appreciate yourself and rejoice in your own achievements.
Self-confidence vs. false humility – It is better to be criticized for self-confidence than to suffer from mind-numbing criticism of others. False humility is considered worse than healthy self-esteem.
Self-satisfaction – It doesn’t matter how many people follow or agree with the author. What is important is that he is happy with himself.
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This diversity has more to do with playing the programs of others and in turn others playing their own. To give you an idea, I’ll use a more general feeling – let’s say fear of people. What do I attract by this fear for the actions of others towards me? Everyone will play it differently = someone will yell at me, another will threaten me, another will blackmail me by making it look like he’s going to die any minute if I don’t do what he wants for him, etc. = but it’s still basically the same fear.
So, in a roundabout way, I have returned to the basic postulate of my observations and my reasoning. We are being completely unnecessarily „dragged“ like a barge to a cliff, by our collective de facto hypnosis, into the belief that everything is in words, logic, facts, evidence, boxes, rules and laws…and yet in a way it’s actually quite simple = it’s simply all about feelings. Everything can be said and most importantly felt in a million ways = that’s why so much of the advice is useful for some and absolutely not for others. And that’s also why you can’t generalize that this or that is bad and hurts; and on the contrary this is beneficial – it depends on how you feel about it…
Because the world is what the majority believes…
And again, some slightly disparate observations for the extended version of this book = people aren’t angry at me, they’re just angry! That’s a big difference, and besides, after all, it’s for the truth that you get angry! Therefore, don’t solve others, solve YOURSELF!
I was so scared that people wouldn’t like me, until I realized that some people don’t like me already! 😃 I’m still waiting for everyone to appreciate me. Not only will that never happen because everyone is busy enough with themselves, but I’m waiting for others to appreciate me too and that’s stupid! I have to appreciate myself! For myself, to enjoy all that I can do, all that I have accomplished. I don’t give a damn about „unhealthy“ self-esteem – I don’t even really know what it is…it’s probably just the envy of the unconfident, the unsuccessful! I’m decent, respectful, understanding, etc. but for myself! Have I ever hurt anyone on purpose?!
How can they appreciate me if I don’t appreciate myself! And how do I know what’s really going on in their heads? Maybe they see me as a god and they’re just jealous, envious and that’s why they attack! Or maybe they take it for granted and so they keep quiet about it but they know I’m great and they don’t know that I don’t!
Rather than unhealthy self-confidence, I find false humility, false modesty, worse! The problem with narcissistic behavior disorder is the people around the person, not the person! Isn’t it just envy after all?! If I could choose, I’d rather be the one who gets slandered for being a narcissist than the one who is stunted, wallows in mind-numbing delusions and criticizes others for being narcissistic!
It doesn’t matter how many people follow me, how many people read me, how many people care about me, how many people agree with me! What matters is if I’m happy with myself!